Suzy is confused between fake and friendly

What’s the difference between  being friendly or being fake?  Can you spot the difference?  Is fakeness spot-able at a glance? or do you have to know someone for awhile to be able to spot it? 

I”ve come in contact with a lot of fake people in my life and i think that it’s not always spot-able at first.  i think that some people have lived life as a “fake” for so long that they don’t even know the difference themselves.  imagine…. not knowing if how you live your life is real or fake. (maybe some counselling is needed!)

i have made it a practice of not asking people how they are….. i think i’ve slipped up, lately, though.  i’ll have to go back to NOT asking.  “How are you” is sometimes a fake question with the occassional  fake answer.  for example:

“Hi, how are you?”  (like i really care… I’m just being polite)

“I’m good.  How are you?” ( actually i’m awful…. just had the car die and i’ve had a headache for 3 days.)

see what i mean?  Fake.  why don’t we just be honest with each other.  I like people that are honest and don’t put on “airs”.  how about something like this:

“Hey! what’s going on today?”

“Hi! Not much except this stupid headache, oh, and my car died.

“That sucks!  Can i help you at all with that?”

“Yeah, you can.  You got any Advil I can have.”

see… isn’t that better?

You have my permission to be honest with me at all times.  If i slip up and ask you how you are, you can tell me honestly how you are.  and i’ll reciprocate by being honest with you. 

2010… the year of not being fake!  How will you do with that?

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5 responses to “Suzy is confused between fake and friendly

  1. Dale (aka Daddy Nobucks)

    Hey I really liked your blog today! (fake- I actually LOVED it!) Ha,ha. Sometimes fake might be a good thing cause I was protecting your ego. You know me well enough to know that I’m kidding around. Great insight on phony-ness!!

    Dale (btw- I am doing very well, no lie!)

  2. I hate being fake but my job in the service industry requires me to be a little on the phony side. But I am mostly sincere when I do ask how are you today and since most of my clients are elderly they tell me all their ailments whether I want to hear it or not…but I did ask for it.

  3. SP, I have had issues with this in the past. I have noticed when one just wants to say ‘Hi’ to someone in passing, they get their noses out of joint if you dont have time and they want to air their dirty laundry in your presence. Or I get stuck listening to someone’s drama when I am having a good day. Saying ‘how are you ?’ opens it up to the person who doesn’t understand that it is a rhetorical question. (or fake).
    Remember French ? Bon Jour (good day ) it’s the perfect greeting, you can say Hi & wish someone a good day all without opening yourself up to their baggage or opening yourself up to sharing your baggage in return.
    I work in an office of around 100 people and if I let each of them tell me how they are in detail each day, I would never get any work done and would get fired for talking all day. I see people getting caught up in this each day, whether they enjoy it or not.
    I simply pass people in the hall and say ‘Bon Jour’ wishing them a good day, and greeting them at the same time. A few have no idea what I am saying, even more just think I am an eccentric wierdo (minimizing the possiblity of dirty laundry sharing), and several greet me in their favorite language, e’gates ! , hola ! ….
    I feel these people get it, but wonder if they are just showing off they know some greeting in another language. It does pose problems when I encounter a fluent speaker of French, but they usually are forgiving, because then they can show they are superior in knowlegde. At first if felt odd to say “Bon Jour”, but then became habit. Now I say ‘Bon Jour’ all the time in English speaking situations without knowing how to speak French. It just feels natural now. Perhaps I should have starting using ‘Good Day’ but I would feel silly pretending to be Australian !
    Bon Soir ! ~ J

  4. SP, I have had issues with this in the past. I have noticed when one just wants to say ‘Hi’ to someone in passing, they get their noses out of joint if you dont have time and they want to air their dirty laundry in your presence. Or I get stuck listening to someone’s drama when I am having a good day. Saying ‘how are you ?’ opens it up to the person who doesn’t understand that it is a rhetorical question. (or fake).
    Remember French ? Bon Jour (good day ) it’s the perfect greeting, you can say Hi & wish someone a good day all without opening yourself up to their baggage or opening yourself up to sharing your baggage in return.
    I work in an office of around 100 people and if I let each of them tell me how they are in detail each day, I would never get any work done and would get fired for talking all day. I see people getting caught up in this each day, whether they enjoy it or not.
    I simply pass people in the hall and say ‘Bon Jour’ wishing them a good day, and greeting them at the same time. A few have no idea what I am saying, even more just think I am an eccentric wierdo (minimizing the possiblity of dirty laundry sharing), and several greet me in their favorite language, e’gates ! , hola ! ….
    I feel these people get it, but wonder if they are just showing off they know some greeting in another language. It does pose problems when I encounter a fluent speaker of French, but they usually are forgiving, because then they can show they are superior in knowlegde. At first if felt odd to say “Bon Jour”, but then it became habit. Now I say ‘Bon Jour’ all the time in English speaking situations without knowing how to speak French. It just feels natural now. Perhaps I should have started using ‘Good Day’ but I would feel silly pretending to be Australian !
    Bon Soir ! ~ J

  5. Thanks for another great blog! (not faking my response – I really liked it!)

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